Bang Bang.

If you had a shiny gun
You could have a world of fun
Speeding bullets through the brains
Of the folks that cause you pains

Its starts out with one. Then you realizes the whole world’s like that. Out there. Out to get you. Opinionated.Always judging. Disapproving. Questioning. Analyzing.

You cant take it anymore. It’s exceeded the threshold. Tried changing. You’ve tried not caring. You’ve tried not thinking. But nothings good enough. Nothings good. Nothings enough.

He is always behind you. Lurking. Checking. Commenting. He’s perfect. In every way. Every day. He says he likes you. He smiles. He screams. He lies. He questions. You answer. He’s unappreciative.  You try harder. He’s critical. You try and ignore. He pushes. And he pushes. And then you can’t take it. Ba-bang. Push – you pull the trigger.

She’s pretty. She’s smart. She’s happy. You’re hooked. She smiles. You swoon. She talks. You’re hooked. You kiss. You love. You give her everything you have. She gives you much more. She seems happy and you think its paradise. She asks. You give. You take. It’s good. It’s great. It was great. It’s not good enough. You were never good enough. She cries. You lie. She wants. You explain. She desires. She aches. She confronts. You reason. You hate. She doesn’t listen. She pushes. And she pushes. And then you can’t take it. Ba-bang. Push – you pull the trigger.

He is your friend. He’s unique. You two kick ass together. He shares. You share. He’s fun. He seems happy. He’s oblivious, you think. He’s content. He’s smarter. He drives a fast car. He taps hotter chicks. You share jokes. You seem to be envious. He makes fun. A tiny push here. A small jab there. He undermines. You laugh it off. He’s cool. He’s sexy. He’s everything you’re not. You like him. But every laugh, every drink, every kick, every chick is a push. And he gets better. Another push. He’s successful. Another push.   And then you can’t take it. Ba-bang. Push – you pull the trigger.

She’s your life. You treasure her. She’s sweet. She’s caring. She’s loving. She’s magnanimous. You cherish her. You depend on her. She adores you. You do everything for her. And much more. She seldom asks. You never let down. She’s picky. She makes your choices. She nags. She’s the decision maker. She questions. She nit-picks. She taunts. She torments. You’re depressed. You try. You fail. You’re demoralized. She’s accusive. She points at you. You are ashamed. She pushes. And she pushes. In hope you can get it together. She pushes some more. And then you can’t take it. Ba-bang. Push – you pull the trigger.

You are smart. You are funny. You are above mediocrity. You are ambitious. You persevere. You make your own ways. You write your own destiny. You are popular. You are witty. You are hollow. You are sad. You seek nothing. You question everything. You are never content. You cant see the good in things. You are scared. Scared to be happy. You crave. You desire. You aspire. You dream. You are irrational. You are neurotic. You want everything. You want anything. You like to push yourself. You allow yourself to be pushed. You push. The world pushes. And you push. . And then you can’t take it. Ba-bang. Push – you pull the trigger.

 Its not whats in your hand, its whats in your head that makes you dangerous.

*Poetry courtesy:Dorothy Parker